Dads, Grandpas, Blacksmiths and Superheroes.....

       

              Ask a young boy who his hero is and 9 times out of 10 you’ll get “my dad” for an answer. Our family moved to Long Island when I was in 2^nd grade and like many other boys my age, my Dad was my hero. However, I was lucky enough to have 2 heroes. We also lived with my Grandfather and Grandmother so I spent a lot of time with my Grandpa Nick as well. So much so, we created a special bond which has lasted for eternity. He was a very unique individual, marching to his own beat. For example, on Sunday he would volunteer to drive me to church and religious instructions. On the way there, he would say, “you’re a good boy right? Let’s go to the diner for pancakes instead of church, God will forgive you!” While others may shake their head, I loved it. It was the little things, like going to the movies to see the newest Peter Sellers’ Pink Panther movie when it came out. I would love to hear him laugh; he had the best laugh. Going to work with Dad and Grandpa Nick was the best. What fun. The guys would nail my Grandpa’s work shoes to the floor so he couldn’t get dressed for work. He would retaliate by blowing his nose into their work overalls so the sleeves stuck together when they got dressed. You know fun stuff. (I see those heads shaking again, get over it!) He also taught me how to bet horses. I remember when Grandpa Nick got to work he would look at the newspaper and pick his horses. He would take out some money, write down some names and fold everything up and leave it in the desk drawer. He told me the guy who came in and picked it up was going to the track that day and would place the bets for him. Yeah right! This was my introduction to bookmakers. Sometimes, he would roll up a piece of paper with money and tell me to bring it to the luncheonette on the corner and hand it to the old lady sitting at the back table. I would walk up the street and as I walked into the store, there would be an older, overweight woman sitting alone at a table in a darkened corner. Thick cigarette smoke and the best R&B music filled the air. It was a place you just wanted to hang out at for the day. The people were like characters in a movie. It was so cool. I later figured out she was running numbers. From there I learned from my Dad how to bet football and what a point-spread was. Yeah, I wouldn’t trade that education for anything in the world.

            Getting back to the horses, this is where it gets interesting. Like most kids, I finally decided to ask my Dad what he did for a living. His response shocked me. He said he and Grandpa were blacksmiths. Naturally, I laughed. How could they be blacksmiths? I’ve never seen them make a horseshoe or even seen a horse in the area. And then he showed me.

My Dad told me that my Grandpa taught him how to work with iron and fire and shape metal and bend steel. One day, Grandpa Nick took a rag and wrapped it around his arm. He took a piece of freshly shaped iron from a leaf spring and placed it between two anvils. Down he came with a chop and split the iron in half. I was shocked. Yeah, Grandpa looked powerful; a short barrel-chested man with big arms and even bigger forearms but breaking steel? He was now not just a hero but a Super Hero. He would heat the iron in the forge, take it out and place it in a machine and then using his body as leverage, bend the iron. It was remarkable. Then I watched my Dad do the same thing and realized these men were amazing! People brought their cars to them with broken springs and they would bend iron, make new ones and put them on their cars.

            As I grew older, I still loved to go to work with them, even throughout my high school years. They wanted to teach me to bend steel and twist iron but I couldn’t afford to have my hands smashed with a hammer or burned in a forge. I was playing guitar at this point and making my money in bands so my hands were important to me. They used to laugh as I wore gloves to do everything and washed my hands like a surgeon, twenty to thirty times a day when I worked in the shop. I was glad I could keep them amused.

            What’s funny is that as I thought about writing this story, I did some research on blacksmiths and it only added to their legend! It seems that history and mythology shows a connection between blacksmiths, magic and the supernatural. According to Sacred-Texts.com, Vulcan, the Roman God of Fire, (Hephaestus of Greek mythology) is the patron of metal workers and blacksmiths. According to tradition, the forges he used were Earth’s volcanoes and in his Olympus workshop, he and his artisans created Hercules shield, Neptune’s Trident, and Pluto’s Helmet. In addition, according to legend, Thor’s hammer was forged by Dwarven blacksmiths. This is pretty cool stuff. Even today, in Africa, blacksmiths are seen as priests or medicine-men, and are considered chief personage in the community. Furthermore, in different portions of Africa metal-workers as a class are seen as superior beings (Sacred-Text.com). Since ancient times, blacksmiths have been linked to magic, due to their power to make metal from barren rocks (lifepaths360.com). Legends and lore regarding blacksmiths have made it all the way to modern times as evidenced by those of us who use a horseshoe as a good luck charm for example.

            Yes, it seems that my assertions about Grandpa Nick and Dad were not far-fetched at all. They truly will remain Super Heroes in my eyes, capable of great feats of strength and magic. And yes, while all of this may be a bit tongue in cheek, there is that basis of truth and the will to believe. I know for that 8 year old boy watching his Grandpa Nick split that piece of iron in two, the feeling of awe and amazement was very real and frankly still is. And go ahead; ask my Dad what he thinks. I think he’ll agree with me. After all, I remember when my Grandpa passed away; my Dad spent days crying like a baby. I believe it was not only because he had lost the only real father he had ever known, but like me, he had also lost his Super Hero too…….

I think about you every day and love you Grandpa Nick!!!   

References

Blacksmiths Credited With Supernatural Attributes (n.d.).  Retrieved June 26, 2014, from http://www.sacred-texts.com/etc/mhs/mhs10.htm

Peel, J. (2008, March 3). Ancient Magic and Power of Blacksmith Charms. . Retrieved June 26, 2014, from http://www.lifepaths360.com/index.php/ancient-magic-and-power-of-blacksmith-charms-16770/

Where the hell are my keys????

            Did you ever put something down, maybe on a table and then later look for it and its gone? You search and search and can’t find it. You know you put it down so you stand there and are like, “What the hell is going on”? It could be keys, a phone, money, or whatever. I know this has happened to you as everyone can recall a time when they’ve torn their house apart. Don’t deny it.

             And then it happens. Minutes or even hours later, you walk in the room and voila! There it is!!! It’s back!!!!!!! You sit there and start questioning your eyesight, your memory and then your sanity. What is really going on here?  

            I have some theories as I’m sure you do too. Is the brain playing tricks on us? Maybe we are subconsciously blocking the item we are looking for, creating an illusion in our minds that it isn’t there. Not buying it? Well then, perhaps ghosts in the house are taking our items to confuse us, play with us or just trying to get our attention. That’s not doing it for you either? My theory is a bit more unconventional and may be viewed, well; as totally insane. But before you judge, open your minds and yes, go ahead and have a good laugh if you must. It’s okay.

            Let’s move to the year 2117. Science and technology have advanced beyond our wildest dreams. This is mainly because of full disclosure by the world’s governments. There are basically no more conspiracies. Earth is an open book. For example, we’ve been told aliens exist; in fact they’ve’ been here for thousands of years. It seems that crazy dude with the wild hair on “Ancient Aliens” was right all along. And believe it or not, civilization didn’t collapse; in fact it embraced the news. We really did land on the moon and yes, there is a real face on Mars. Climate change wasn’t a product of the liberal left, it was a fact. Just ask the tens of thousands of seniors who have fled Florida since the winters are way too harsh; especially for those who don’t ski. It was also a letdown to know the Mafia really did kill J.F.K.and Marilyn Monroe. So obvious! And finally, Barack Obama was an American citizen (Sorry).
            Even though most of the country now speaks Spanish, some of the government initiatives are still written in English for those who haven't made the transition from the Spanish-English Language Act of 2076 enacted during America's Tri-Centennial celebration. Yes, this is not your father’s America anymore!

            While society and our culture have changed, apparently the nation’s love of game shows and reality shows has remained in a nostalgic state. America just can’t get enough. This leads us to a popular game show; a futuristic version of “America’s Funniest Videos” and “Candid Camera” for those who remember. “Back to the Future...The Game Show” is a show in which contestants travel back in time and “steal” an item from a random citizen in a random time and viewers get to watch their reactions. Since the targets are not aware that time travel exists, they have no idea they are being viewed by a live audience over 100 years in the future and are entertaining the masses. Sounds cruel, but it is funny, watching people go absolutely nuts trying to find the item, and it’s even funnier when it’s put back and then discovered by our victims. In a society so advanced, it is remarkable that humor is still provided in the misfortunes and desperate actions of the so-called “old-timers” of the past. It’s still fun taking advantage of the less informed. The more things change the more they stay the same.

            So the next time you go to pick up your keys and they are gone; just look up; smile and wave and ask to have them back. Maybe the time traveler contestant will show some mercy, put them back and move on to someone else. Someone who doesn’t know about the show and can boost the ratings!  

© 2014 Nick Malcuit

A Champion's Story....

            This is a story about a champion. Yes, the Olympics are over and there were no actual medals won by our hero. This champion’s story is about desire, inspiration, and acceptance. The champion’s name is Nick and he is a big, strapping 18 year old, “gentle giant” full of compassion and a heart of gold. Part of a blended family, he has many relatives, some closer than others and has an extremely dedicated and caring circle of support. It is this circle that has believed in, encouraged, challenged, taught, comforted and inspired Nick to get to this point.

            As his step dad, I met Nick when he was 7 years old. He had been diagnosed with PDD-NOS over 4 years earlier. My wife insists it was the result of his vaccinations or at the very least they played a major role in his diagnosis. After receiving his vaccinations, he ran a very high fever and basically shut down, becoming nonverbal for years. In addition, she dealt with the horrific advice of so-called experts; having to hear the words “no one would blame you if you put him away”.                   

            What makes those words even more tragic is how Nick’s life unfolded as our blended family came together.  Nick’s 14 year old step-sister, 11 year old step-brother and 4 year old brother (also on the spectrum) became his closest friends. The six of us did everything together. We went to movies, high school football games, school concerts and plays, and vacations. Soon, Nick began to show interest in outside activities and hobbies.

            Before he even hit the age of 12, he had taken drum lessons, played youth soccer and youth basketball and attended summer programs with swimming and other recreational activities. A few years later he won gold medals in the Special Olympics, joined a bowling league, ran track in middle school and played percussion in the school concert bands, even competing in the All-State competition. He became an avid football fan and has followed his brother’s football career from youth leagues through high school and now onto coaching. Today he is an accomplished drummer, capable of playing in a rock and roll cover band if he chooses. He also loves to play his piano and even sings as well (see our You Tube page). Our summers consist of weekly vacations at a timeshare and Nick loves the outdoor pool and other activities, even trying horseback riding last year.    

            Nick, seeing his sister and brother graduate high school and go onto college became interested in learning to drive and yes, going to college. Driving was a very serious issue and the entire family talked about it often. We decided that if he wanted to drive, he would have to earn the privilege himself. His mom brought him to the DMV, told him to go in, get the book and start studying for his permit test. Nick read that book for almost 3 years. As he became more confident, I showed him how he could get on-line practice tests and he began to take them. He did well at times but was inconsistent. When he turned 18, he decided he was ready. So we took him to the DMV and he took the permit test. He ended up taking it 4 times but he passed, by himself! He got his permit. And yes, you guessed it. Since basically no one would get in the car with him, I volunteered for driving duty first. We went to parking lots after dinner for months. And guess what? Nick now drives locally in Poughkeepsie and he’s doing well!

            As the driving began, Nick also insisted he wanted to go to college. It seems trips to my daughter’s and son’s school and especially my son’s off–campus apartment planted a seed. We tried to explain how much work is involved in going to college, but Nick said he could do this. It was then I recalled the numerous I.E.P. meetings throughout the years and how we would watch people’s eyes roll, hear the snickers, and see the heads looking down when my wife mentioned college for Nick. I have to say; at times we almost bought into their negativity and gave in to how they viewed Nick’s future. But his mom would have none of it. She would do whatever it took if this is what her son wanted. After some research we found a two-year program called the College Experience @ the College of St. Rose in Albany which incorporates life skills and college classes to help students learn, train for a job and transition to work and independent living. Living Resources is the agency administering the program. This was Nick’s goal. Living off-campus in a house with other students and going to classes. So Mom did all the leg work and hours of administrative paperwork. After a couple of trips to Albany, there he was, ready to interview for a position in the program. Nick had to write an essay on why he wanted to go to college and fill out the application himself. He had an overnight stay, shadowing another student for a full day to see if this really was for him. Of course, he loved it, confirming what we already knew. This was a great opportunity for him. When he went up to interview with the staff, he had to write an essay on who inspires him the most. Nick chose to write about his mother, saying his mom told him if he works hard he can do anything he wants and also talked about how his mom went back to school and became a nurse. Nick climbed each step in the process and finally had to meet with the President of the college for the final interview. This would determine his status. Again, we drove to Albany and he completed his last task. Dressed in a shirt and tie, I couldn’t help but think back to the little boy I met at 7, who seemed totally content to sit for hours watching Barney the Dinosaur videos. And on Monday, February 24, 2014 I got a call from the agency saying Nick was accepted into the program. I was told that he did it himself; that he explained that he really wanted this and that they were so excited to have him coming in as a freshman. I went over to Nick and told him I had some news. He smiled really wide and said, “I got in!” Yes, he knew and it was then I realized how much he wanted it. When his mom got home he told her and after the screaming and the tears, reality set in. Nick is leaving for college in the summer. Saying those words is unbelievable. I asked Nick where he’ll be in 5 years. He said working, driving a new Honda, living in an apartment with a girlfriend. All I could think was why not, Nick, why not!

            Those of you familiar with our family know OneStep4Autism and how we are working towards opening our own form of a group residence. Nick has made it clear that he does not intend to live with us in our house. He plans on living on his own. All I can say is good for you, Nick. It is bittersweet to let him go out on his own and build a new life for himself in a new town, but as his mom says, we can’t stand in his way; he needs to spread his wings. 

            This sounds like the end of the story but it is really just the beginning. The beginning of a two year story that’s ending hasn’t been written. We don’t know where Nick will be in two years when he completes the program. The agency believes as Nick has told us that he will be living in the capital region of New York moving on to a job and apartment. Either way, Nick saw an opportunity and went for it. He never has to say “I should have” as so many of us have done in our lives. Nick is my hero. He is our champion. He has won the gold, silver and bronze medals combined as far as we’re concerned. While we celebrate Nick and are so proud to share his story, there are other stories to be heard. We want to hear about your champions; about the inspirational people out there achieving what others said they could not. Please, forward your stories to us at OneStep4Autism 

© Nick Malcuit 2/27/14

L.B. and O.J...

 
         

Last weekend, my daughter came over so we could watch the new Lifetime movie "Lizzie Borden Took an Axe" together. I don't know where our fascination with Lizzie and her trial came from, but we both sat there glued to the set. For those of you who enjoy the macabre, I urge you to spend a weekend in Fall River at the Lizzie Borden Bed and Breakfast; as you will not be disappointed. Besides our trip to the Borden house, this renewed interest in Lizzie Borden made me think about a paper I wrote for one of my recent on-line classes...Hope you enjoy..

            They both have been called crimes of the centuries. Both involved brutal bloody murders, high profile suspects and sensational media coverage not just locally, but nationally and even worldwide. And that is not where the similarities end. In fact, that is just the beginning when talking about two of the most famous murderers who were found not guilty. Yes, Lizzie Borden and O.J.Simpson should have been convicted but even 100 years between trials couldn’t keep social circumstances and media frenzy from allowing both to get away with murder.

            The similarities of the cases are striking. The gruesome bloody murders of Abby and Andrew Borden occurred August 4, 1892. Just over 100 years later on June 12, 1994 Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman were both savagely stabbed to death. The murders resembled the plot of a horror movie, and that is what set the tone for the trials, whether the two suspects in question could have committed such brutal acts.

            While inquiring how both were acquitted it’s important to recognize the insight of the defense for each trial. The attorneys for both were able to look at the big picture, feed a gossip hungry society and have a sense of where the media would fit into their defense. In addition, their defense strategy within cultural context greatly reinforced their case.

            Criminal justice recognizes means, motive and opportunity as the key aspects needed to convict a person beyond a reasonable doubt. After authorities investigated these crimes it was determined the suspects fully met the criteria. Lizzie Borden had killed her father and stepmother and O.J.Simpson had killed his ex-wife and her friend. While there were no eye witnesses to either crime, much of the evidence in both cases was viewed as strong in the minds of many historians (Linder). Furthermore, far-fetched alibis were presented on behalf of both suspects; O.J. practicing golf shots at night in his yard and Lizzie searching for fishing sinkers in a barn loft on an excruciatingly hot August day (Eaton).

            Lizzie Borden, during her inquest testimony and questioning had many inconsistencies and problems with her answers. In addition, she had tried to buy prussic acid, a potent poison, the day before the murders. However, these significant pieces of information, including her entire inquest testimony were not allowed in the actual trial (Linder). Furthermore, the blue dress Lizzie was wearing the day of the murder was burned days after the crime because it was said to be covered in paint. Her alibi of being in the barn looking for lead sinkers raised more questions as police stated there were no footprints on the dusty floor where she was supposed to have been (Linder). The case against her mounted and a grand jury convened and indicted her.

            O.J.Simpson was linked to this crime from the outset mainly due to physical evidence. There was hair, fiber and blood evidence linking Simpson to the crime, including socks in Simpson’s home with blood matching his ex-wife. Additionally, a left bloody glove found at the murder scene matched a right glove found at Simpson’s residence (Linder). But perhaps the strangest twist in this case was the infamous Bronco chase. On June 17, 1994, as he was about to be arrested, O.J. left a rambling note that most viewed as a suicide note (Linder) and fled in his white Ford Bronco. With his friend Al Cowlings driving, they went on a slow “police chase” till he returned home with police following and was arrested. This very odd act convinced many people of his guilt and became a cultural event; “Where were you during O.J.’s Bronco chase?”
            In these trials it was demonstrated how cultural and social factors could convince a jury to overlook evidence and arrive at verdicts that shook the nation. In the case of Lizzie Borden, it was late 19^th century Fall River, MA that influenced the trial. The defense, to their credit, worked within that ideology. Her lead attorney was former governor George Dexter Robinson and he received $25,000 of Lizzie’s $40,000 legal fees in addition to becoming a celebrity at the trial. The defense established that it was unthinkable to imagine a church going woman of means, doing charitable work, free to enjoy her leisure at her father’s residence being capable of this massacre. It was stated,” To suggest a woman of good family, blameless life, and unimpeachable character could possibly commit two such murders is to suggest something so rare…. almost unknown to criminology” (Robertson, 11). Fall River was in denial, because if Lizzie was guilty, then perhaps any apparently proper middle class woman might be equally capable of such violence (Robertson, 2). At the trial, her feminine demeanor, virtuous poses, and appearance of the dutiful daughter was too much for the prosecution to overcome especially with their portrayal of her as a Jekyll and Hyde personality (Linder). The press got behind her as were many feminists who visited her in jail and rallied for a representative jury. She became the silent star of the show. In fact, even the judge, as he charged the jury preparing to deliberate told them they should take into account Lizzie's exceptional Christian character, which entitled her to every inference in her favor (Linder). Lizzie Borden never took the stand in her defense. The jury convened about 90 minutes and returned a not guilty verdict. The New York Times, after the verdict, commended the jury on their promptness in acquitting Lizzie. They also blasted the Police and Prosecution for bringing the indictment in the first place.

            Similarly, O.J.Simpson’s defense team did not allow him to testify. It has been reported his “dream team’ as they were called cost him between 3 and 6 million dollars. Like the Borden trial, this time it was 1990’s Los Angeles that influenced the case. Just as gender and wealth played a part in Fall River 100 years earlier, race and wealth were the players in this trial. On the heels of the Rodney King trial and subsequent riots in LA in 1992 (Wingate), many African-Americans and other citizens alike, had lost respect and trust in the Police. Therefore, at the heart of the defense was race. This trial, was a “show” as it was televised live, allowing everyone involved to be seen by all of America and the world. It was a showcase for the defense team and for the former football hero turned accused murderer. Defense attorney Johnnie Cochran was able to expose lead detective Mark Fuhrman as a racist and convinced the jury and much of the public that evidence could have been planted during the investigation. In addition, Fuhrman didn’t help his cause by citing the Fifth Amendment during his testimony (Linder). As Cochran magnified the relationship between African-Americans and the police, many critics accused him of playing an unethical “race card” (Wingate) but for African-Americans it was not unethical and it wasn’t a “card”, but a way of life. A few years earlier, they had seen four police officers acquitted in the videotaped beating of Rodney King. The polarized climate in Los Angeles at that time cannot be understated. Furthermore, defense attorney Barry Sheck, an expert in the new field of DNA evidence supported the possibility that evidence was compromised during the collection process by police. The defense was not arguing the existence of the evidence, but the integrity and reliability of it and how it was obtained. Finally, there was a severe blunder by the prosecution when they let O.J.Simpson try on the gloves that were in evidence and they didn’t fit (Linder). This high priced defense team did its job. In spite of all the evidence which clearly pointed to Simpson, the jury came back with a not guilty verdict in less than 4 hours. In this modern era of opinion polls, Gallup reported in 1995, 78% of blacks and 42% of whites said the verdict was correct and only 22% of people polled said race had no effect on the verdict (Linder).

            Many similarities were uncovered in researching these cases but perhaps the most startling was what happened to both suspects after their acquittals. As the public had time to digest these cases, both Borden and Simpson, wealthy and celebrity in status, were ostracized by their local communities. Lizzie Borden went on to inherit much wealth from her father and purchased a huge mansion in the wealthy part of town on “the hill” and named it Maplecroft (Linder). O.J.Simpson spent much of his time after the criminal trial involved in a civil trial which he was found guilty of wrongful death (Linder). Even though Simpson vowed to find the real killer, no other killer was ever found. The same can be said in the deaths of Andrew and Abby Borden. No other killer or killers were ever found. Borden lived alone and never married till her death in 1927 at the age of 67. Simpson, plagued with financial and legal problems for years following his trial, is currently in prison for kidnapping and robbery charges from a 2007 case in Las Vegas.

            Both of these people were found not guilty despite damaging evidence to the contrary and both are remembered by a couple of lasting images and quotes. The O.J. trial cannot be discussed without recalling that image of him unsuccessfully trying to squeeze his hands into the murder gloves in the courtroom with Cochran stating, “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit” (Linder). Lizzie was immortalized through a child’s rhyme written at the time of the trial; “Lizzie Borden took an axe, gave her mother forty whacks, when she saw what she had done, she gave her father forty-one” (Linder).

Works Cited

Eaton, William. "Just like oj's trial but without kato." American Journalism Review. 17 (1995): n. page. Web. http://www.questia.com/googleScholar.qst?docId=5001654734

Linder, Doug. "The Trial of Lizzie Borden." Famous Trials . N.p., 2004. Web.

            http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/LizzieBorden/bordenhome.html

Linder, Doug. "The Trial of O J Simpson." Famous Trials. N.p., 2000. Web

            http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/Simpson/Simpsonaccount.htm

Robertson, Cara. "Representing "Miss Lizzie": Cultural convictions in the trial of Lizzie Borden." Yale Journal of Law and the Humanities. (1996): 1-53. Retrieved from,             http://campus.westlaw.com.library.esc.edu/result

Wingate, Keith. "The O.J.Simpson Trial: Seeing the elephant." The University of California,   Hastings College of the Law. N.p., 2009. Web http://www.uchastings.edu/racism-race/oJ.html